It's not like I don't pay attention to the way I look, it's just that my opinion on the matter seems to change quite often. Some days I will look in the mirror and quite like what I see.
I like the way I've styled my hair today, I'll think, or maybe I will comment on my eye make-up or something - you get the idea.
Despite this, on other days when I look back at my own reflection, I will not see the girl I usually see staring back at me. I'm never quite sure why, but I'll just see this person who immediately makes me want to look away, as if I could hide from her. The same girl I complimented a few days ago is staring back at me, but she has changed somehow. This is weird for me, as although I am quite a shy person overall, I am usually the most confident person in my friend group when it comes to the way I look. I'm not self-obsessed or anything, I just tend to have some really self-conscious friends.
Anyway, back to the question I mentioned at the beginning.
If you asked me that same question around this time last year, I would have given you the same answer... except for one thing.
I would have been lying.
This time last year, I absolutely HATED the way I looked. The same probably would have gone for the year before that too. I would look in the mirror and feel like I was stuck in a stranger's body most of the time. It sounds cheesy and ridiculous, but I was desperate to one day look in the mirror and see what I felt like inside.
It wasn't just one particular thing about myself; it was more of a large mixture of things. Within that mixture were some aspects of my appearance that I'm still not fond of now, such as my eyebrows, general body shape and face shape, as well as some little things that I shouldn't have even bothered worrying about, such as my bad skin. I know now that this was quite silly, because most teenagers have problems with spots and stuff like that. I had seen many teenagers with skin worse than mine at the time, so I possibly could have even considered myself lucky in comparison (not that it mattered, it shouldn't have been a big deal either way). My skin isn't as bad now, but that's mainly due to the fact that I have found the right products to use on my skin.
What I'm basically saying is that I was all over the place. I won't go into the details of what I used to tell myself, because that would just be depressing, and no one wants to hear that. I wouldn't tell myself these things constantly, but it only took one bad picture of myself and my self-confidence would come tumbling down around me.
The oddest part of it all was that it was just me telling myself these horrible things. A lot of my friends who also had (as most of them still have) problems with body image told me how pretty and lucky I was on a regular basis, which I found perplexing.
For some reason, having long blond hair, a (vaguely) curvy body and blue eyes is considered desirable for a woman/girl in this day and age.
However, I see this as no different from having short brown hair, mid-length red hair, long black hair, a petite/bigger build, a taller/shorter build, brown eyes or green eyes. So whether you have these features or features completely different to these ones I just mentioned, there is no need to worry about the way you look. You may not particularly like your appearance, but you will definitely come across people in life who will like it a lot. Everyone has their own idea of what attractive means - just because you aren't one person's doesn't mean you won't be the next's.
To be honest though, either way, who cares? People aren't going to stop loving you as a person just because you have blue eyes, a small waist, red hair etc!
And if you're sure that someone doesn't like you for the way you look, screw them!
Are you going to cry yourself to sleep every night just because some mean person insulted your appearance? Because whoever that is certainly won't. Don't give power and influence over your life to the people you know don't deserve it.
To conclude:
If you are having similar problems to this, do keep all this in mind. And if you are a generally self-confident person who is reading this - good for you! Just don't let anyone tell you you're big headed for liking your appearance.
If this helped you at all or you just found this interesting, remember to follow me on blogger and bloglovin. Also, share this with anyone who you think might find this useful - I know quite a few people who could do with getting the message.
Or, if you are looking for someone else to explain this (possibly someone who can word it better), look at these:
Zoe(Zoella) and Louise(SprinkleOfGlitter)'s Chummy Chatter - Why Are You So Skinny?
Here is a blog post by Zoe related to the same topic: http://www.zoella.co.uk/2011/03/why-are-you-so-skinny.html
Emma Blackery - How You Look and Why It Doesn't Matter
Best wishes,
Lucy x
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